Peace Daily

Birthday Month, I'm Old

2012-01-21T15:47:00.002-04:00

Hey Strangers!

Blowing the cobwebs off of this blog. I'm 50. Hit that big 5-0 this month. That should mean new adventures, right? Of course it should. AARP, and Senior Discounts are out there waiting to be found. I was blown over when I found out that the 50 plus crowd can get a 10% discount at Krispy Kreme!!! No wonder my new peeps are smiling. They have been getting well hidden perks.

Let me see, has anything changed for me? Well, my son is still a teen. I'm still employed. I do have a new truck, well not totally new, but new to me...well not even new to me any more as I have had it a while now. Diet, yes, I still struggle, and now my body has turned on me with hiatal hernias and such, so it really is a new adventure with all of that going on.

Anywho, here I am again, and here I go. I will, of course, return. :)

Peace

Happy Memorial Day

2011-05-30T20:32:00.002-03:00

In memory of those who have served, and who still serve. Thank you.

*I'm laying here with the heating pad on my left knee, which is having an arthritic flare up, which is probably due to my sucky left heel. Is there some conspiracy to keep me out of the park and not walking??? Anyone with good ideas for exercising sitting down???

Peace

Today

2011-04-09T17:15:00.003-03:00

I walked only 1 mile, and I've been rolling my heel on a tennis ball most of the day because my foot hurts and I'm limping. I'm not giving up. I'm gonna hit the pavement again. You may see me toting a cane, but I'm gonna walk some more. Tomorrow my village is having their annual MS Walk. I'm contemplating showing up. Before the leg surgery and the plantar getonmynerveswiththeheelitis thing, marathon walking was my goal, and I was on my way.

Even though my foot is hurting, I enjoyed my walk. My challenge today is my food intake. I've let my choices go to pot being semi depressed about the state of my walking, so, I feel hungry, like all day. And I've not missed a meal. I feel very snacky, which is not good. Not good at all for the day is not yet done. Oh well, such is the life of a lifetime loser.

Blogging, not me...

2011-03-18T21:08:00.002-03:00

I have been wandering around the web, work, my city, the state, and everywhere else, except on this page. I suck. But I continue to show up here, eventually, to blog some small thing, and then I'm off to wander around some more.

Peace

Foot, Heel, and Pork

2011-02-22T21:07:00.005-04:00

Plantar Faciitis sucks! Okay, as if it's not enough with the surgery on the right leg, the left heel decides to cut up, (raised southern here and we cut up all the time), and ruins my return to walking. So my new strategy is food. It always returns to food with me, doesn't it?

I have no label for this, although I've seen quite a few. I'm trying to be as meatless as possible, but I will not say I'm a vegetarian, or a flexitarian, or even a pescatarian. I've never been a big meat eater to start with, or at least I thought I was not, until I thought about my culturally southern endorsed foods!!! I fancied that up, but in the south, we are not always mad at the pig. In fact, we like him. General statement, don't take offense. If you happen to be southern and hate the pig, then more power to you. I used the pig, and he was good. In all seriousness, I like pork, and I liked the wrong types of pork. The salted kind.

So, back to me...I'm on day 5 with no meat, (yes, I had seafood), but no pork, turkey/chicken, or beef. And it's not too bad. I'm anxious to see if there is any difference in my weight. And until I can walk again, pain free, it's another thing to keep me motivated to lose.

Peace

Life

2011-02-15T19:55:00.002-04:00

Oh, many things are happening, have happened, and is to come the Lord willing for my life. I've been distraught, at a loss of what to do, frustrated, not focused, very focused, sorting things out, alone, not alone, exhausted, seeking peace, at peace, it goes on and on. It's called my life. It may be your life, too.

I'm 49. I wonder if all of what I'm currently feeling, thinking, running from, running to, has to do with being 49. I'm on the cusp of life. I pray I am able to grow into a very old lady, who is wise, vivacious, and funny. I want to be so many things, and I want the years to be kind to me.

I realize that on the inside, I'm still a little girl, looking out into the world with hopes that I can do it all, but cautious because who wants to get in trouble. Maybe that's why I appreciate structure so much. I like written rules, so that I will know my boundaries. But then I think, boundaries never stopped me when it came to my weight. Information is abounding on what is the healthiest weight for me, and yet, I cross the line all the time.

My life is so much more than weight, and yet, my life has been stifled by weight. If I am honest, my self esteem has been very low for many years. I sold myself short. Really, I don't even think I sold myself. I think I gave myself away when really I never had to do that at all. I'm glad at 49 I now know this to be true.

I am a person who is worth it. Love is what I'm worth. Whether I am loving me or allowing others to love me. Life circumstances has hindered me to allow others to value me. I think I had no self worth. But see, I'm worth it. Now I know it. I am worth it. I can allow love in, and I can love.

Peace

It's Not That I Don't Love You...Blog

2011-02-10T21:30:00.002-04:00

I've had quite a few weeks, and only just really starting to feel half way normal. It's very hard to lose kids. They have been my kids for a very long time,and to have to hand them over and hope for the best, was awful, when all I felt like doing was keeping them where I could see them, and protect them. Will she even know how to protect them? Okay...maybe I'm not ready to blog about this just yet.

Peace

The Goal

2011-01-30T17:35:00.000-04:00

Due to my current lifestyle which is to change on tomorrow, I've been a bit movie challenged. As in, I've not had the opportunity to see real adult movies with the exception of once this past year, at an honest to goodness theater. The time has come. My plan is to see 3 of the Oscar nominated movies before the Oscars. The first will be this coming Friday, Black Swan.

Suiting Up For Things To Come

2011-01-29T23:10:00.003-04:00

I ordered these tonight and I'm looking forward to their arrival. I have plans. Upcoming, future plans. And if the Lord is willing then so am I. I will finally have the time to get to the gym in the evenings after work, and walk it off some more. OH HAPPY DAY!!!

I've been having heel pain though. Like, I walk like an old lady. I purchased some of those heel support thingee's. My mother suggested them, and today, knowing I had to get around a lot on foot and in my regular shoes, I stopped at CVS and met the most knowledgeable Pharmacy person I've ever met. She schooled me! I came out of there with 2 heel support thingee's, and as soon as I got back to the car, I put 1 of my purchases in my shoes, and OH MY!!! It was heaven!!! The relief was instant. My plan is to purchase a bunch of heel support thingee's and stuff them in all my everyday shoes, including my sneakers.

Winter Storm Delayed...

2011-01-28T17:35:00.002-04:00

The babies are still here, but it is to be short lived. The winter weather up north led to changes in travel plans, so now it's Monday. Torture to the nth degree. I'm so ready for it to be over already. I need closure, it there such a thing as having 2 little folks in your home who are related to you for over 2 years to have closure. It's just the anxiety of finally saying, they're not here anymore...

Peace

Foster Care

2011-01-26T23:24:00.001-04:00

Well, my babies are out of here tomorrow. They gave me 1 day notice to have them ready and at the airport. You pray? Pray. My prayer is for safety, security, and ...

Peace

Today

2011-01-19T22:02:00.003-04:00

Today is my birthday. As I type "birthday" I have an urge to jump around and do the cabbage patch, the running man, and moonwalk. Not. Seriously, what a blessing it is to be another year older. My prayer is that this year be a year of growth, fun, and peace.

Peace

Lazy Saturday

2011-01-08T16:08:00.002-04:00

Lazy Saturday, and that's just how I like it. We're doing nada much today. I'm so happy to being much of nothing. Laundry, that's a given. Prepping dinner for Sunday, that's a given. Googling, (no explanation). No, I did not even get out to walk, and I'm drinking way too much iced tea for a chilly day, but I'm in the south and iced tea is what we do here.

I'm getting ready to do a little research on colleges for my son. He's a junior, but we're in 2011 and it's time to start looking seriously at affordability and his plans, and trust me, he has BIG plans. We'll see, as the year goes on, what transpires.

Well, lazy Saturday to you, too. Don't do too much, or you'll make me look bad.

Peace

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011!!!

2011-01-01T21:46:00.005-04:00

I wanted to insert an image but for some reason my image insertion capabilities are sucky today. The image would have said, "HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011," to you. And so, because of my sucky image insertion capabilities, HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011 to you!!! I really wish it for you, the same as I wish it for me.

There's so many things I wish for this year, but mostly, I wish to be able to walk by faith and not by sight. I want to live as though all of my wishes were true, and they are true, by faith, I believe it is so.

I started my daylight morning hours by rousing from a deep slumber because of total silence in my room. I share my room with a snorer. A 6 year old, sounding just like an old tired man, snorer. No snoring meant she was not asleep. Dang!!! But I had a date with my 16 year old, and he was up and staring at me as I stepped out of my bedroom door. Mind you, he's been home on vacation for almost 2 weeks and this is the first time I've seen him standing on 2 feet, eyes open, and comprehending the English language since day one. He was ready to hit the park, with Mommy. And after weeks of Panera, Mommy was ready, too.

I showered, dressed, grabbed my Ipod and a bottled water and headed out the door and to the park. I enjoyed my walk, but I tell you, 3 weeks of not walking for exercise, not eating as I should, and generally, doing all things wrong during the holiday season, has left me out of shape, out of shape. Some of you may know what that means. Yes, I'm over weight, and so that makes me out of shape, but I was losing, and pretty active. Since my self imposed hiatus of anything remotely healthy, I'm overweight and out of shape, hereby, out of shape, out of shape.

Back to my wishes, and faith walk. I'm looking forward to losing as much weight as I can while still enjoying good foods. I'm looking forward to doing more fun things for a single, 48, soon to be 49 year old Mom. I know I have hurdles, (the children will be leaving, just a matter of when is a big hurdle), but I'm looking forward to conquering all of my hurdles, and I will, by faith.

Peace

Wishing You and Yours a Very Merry & Blessed Christmas.

2010-12-25T15:20:00.003-04:00

Dooney & Bourke was gifted to me this Christmas, so it's a marvelous Christmas!!! Make up case and key fob, (don't you just love that word), included. I pray that you have had a wonderful day so far. God is blessing here and I am thankful. I'm still overdosing on bread, and I hate it.

Hair it is.

2010-12-23T22:35:00.002-04:00

Sometimes I'm at a loss as to what pictures to share with you, dear blog. Generally I take a picture of myself just about every day, but..., most times I delete-delete, because I am not the most photogenic person. In fact, I can say that I'm a deer in headlights. Cameras bring out the stiffness in me. If I snap one of myself, usually, it takes about 10 shots before I get one I like, and even then it's suspect.

Weight. I think I don't like pictures because of my weight. Plus, I have gray in my hair at least 3 weeks out of 5 or 6 weeks. They show up, and I know they're coming, but still...I'm surprised. Why does my hair have to gray early? Who told my dad to have this type of hair? I know it was him because I have way more gray than my mom, plus, there's pictures of him, sporting a process in the early 60's and then a bald spot surrounded by grays in the 70's and 80's. And the hairs are not just gray. They are white! Luckily for me my eyebrows are still brown because I have a cousin, her eyebrows and eyelashes...gray. So, I'm thankful. Where's the mirror?

I'm Beginning

2010-12-22T23:03:00.004-04:00

I am really beginning to hate BREAD!!! And along with it the dreaded Panera's!!! For the last 2 weeks I feel as if bread has ruined me. I feel like a bagel. Round, full bodied, with a whole in the middle called my mouth! Just needed to vent. Tomorrow I weigh. It won't be good.

Tick.......Tock

2010-12-14T23:18:00.001-04:00

Just holding my breath, and waiting for the verdict of when? She told her mom tonight that she didn't want to leave. She told me that she liked her friends, and she loved me and she wanted to stay here with me. She asked me to rescue her again just in case. What do I do? I hold my breath.

Peace

Life Ever Changes

2010-12-10T16:55:00.003-04:00

So, I've been very down lately because the little people in my home for the last 2 plus years will be going back to their parent. We are all related, but they won't be living on my street, in my neighborhood, in my village, in my state. They will be far away from me, and I will worry about them. I don't know how I can even say bye bye. Heart wrenching, heart breaking, and yet, once they leave, I will be free to do lots of me things. That's me trying to look on the bright side because the real side is oh so sad.

The bright side says I will be free to not rush out of work and pick up babies, and dash home for meals, showers, homework, yelling, quiet, and night night, because tomorrow we get up and dash, and bustle, and hustle to do it all over again.

The bright side says I can go to the gym after work, and walk safely in a building with an indoor track because by the time I get off of work, the park I love is too dark, and I don't feel so comfortable walking in the park at night.

The bright side says that at a moments notice I can go to the beach and crack crab legs and stare at the ocean, and maybe shop a bit.

The bright says says that I can sleep in an hour or so later, and not have the morning rush to get it all together and still look cute when I get to where I'm going. Why, I can even go to Wednesday night bible study if I want, or stop in at one of the local restaurants for a leisurely dinner. Why, I might even Zumba! Who knows???!!!

The real side says I'm not in...

Peace

Feeling

2010-12-08T23:16:00.001-04:00

I think my household size is about to change, and I'm coping. At least I'm trying to cope. If you pray, say a small one for me and mine. Thanks.

Tea Time, No Crumpets

2010-12-06T21:13:00.002-04:00

My evening relaxation usually includes Twinings Earl Grey, Equal, and a good squirt of lemon juice. Tonight is no different. I'm about to partake. Ahhhh, Law & Order: Criminal Intent, Christmas tree with nice lights, and kids in bed. Can't ask for everything, but this is not bad.

Panera Bread

2010-12-05T23:13:00.004-04:00

Panera, the place of bread. Bad, bad bread!!! Tasty, tasty bread!!! Don't even try, I beg you, their Cinnamon Crunch Bagel. It's addictive, and it's not worth it, but boy is it good. In all seriousness, it's goodness is not conducive to my lifestyle and I can no longer indulge. I know when to back off, and I'm backing off. I'm going back to fruit and water. They're safe. At least for me.

Peace

Hi, I'm Peace

2010-12-05T21:50:00.005-04:00

Most mornings either at my desk at work or in my car I take a picture of myself and put some quirky posting underneath it. This picture is one of those. Just one of the things I do to entertain others. Let it also be known that I am very camera shy. You'd never know it from my morning pictures but I very rarely allow others to take pictures of me. I look like a deer in headlights. Awful!!!

I have one biological teenage son and I am caretaker to 2 little relatives whom I love very much and I will probably never show you pictures of because of their current position in my home. No, I'm not a kidnapper. I am fostering them and there's rules surrounding the fostering of children. I'm not sure how much longer they will be with me, but I've had them with me now for over 2 years. One in daycare and one in kindergarten. I work full time, and I'm single. Notice how "I'm single" is thrown out there. I'm not in a relationship, but by no means am I single, not with 3 kids. Oh, did I mention my mother. She's in the picture, too. So, I have a some what busy life, but I feel like I could be doing so much more with it.

Our home is not house beautiful. It's a standard box with living room, kitchen, bedrooms, and baths. Our kitchen is in need of major repairs, and the whole house is rather cluttered, but it's home. One day I hope to have the entire kitchen renovated. It's in dire need for new cabinets and flooring. I'm thinking of having it become my next project, and as I think it out, I'll keep you posted.

This is my son: He's awesome, and I'm so blessed to have him as a gift from God. He has made me be a more considerate, and conscious person. I want to grow old and love on my grandbabies, so that's one of my big motivators for losing weight. I'd also like to make sure that his future wife will not encourage him to place me in a nursing home because I am a quirky, unfocused, busy body.

Even as I write this post, I'm being busy. I have homemade chicken soup on right now. It will be making its appearance as my lunch a few times this week. I've already prepared my salad, and my oatmeal for tomorrow. I'm on my way to finish some laundry and stalk a few of you.

Personal

2010-12-05T21:38:00.006-04:00

I was thinking today. Don't know why, ha!!! It's the weekend and my motto is..."Don't even think about it." But I did. I read a lot of blogs. I stalk quite a few. I honor a few by becoming their followers. Myself, I only have 6 followers, none of which post here, so I think they may have had pity on some of my pathetic posts, or I became a follower of their blog and they decided to become a mercy follower. At any rate, 6. That's all I got. So, if you happen upon me, and you get this far in your reading then know I really do appreciate you stopping in and taking a gander.

So, back to what I was thinking. I noticed that the really serious bloggers let you see their lives. Their day to day lives are exposed because they give it their all. I confess. I have been an off and on blogger for years, but I never really let you, the reader, get to "know" me, this blogger. I'm paranoid. I think I don't want anyone I know to see what I really think, how much I weigh, my struggles, my quirkiness, etc., you get me? I knew that you would.

I have made a big decision regarding my privacy. No. I won't give you my address, but I will tell you more about me. I will share more of me. You will see more of me. So, that's my confession and promise.

I am Peace and I am a blogger.

Wish List: It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas!

2010-12-03T19:12:00.014-04:00

I love this time of year! The last Christmas Wish List I recall making was in the very early 2000's, other than that there was those long lists full of puppies, and Suzy Homemaker Ovens when I was a wee little one. Today, my tastes have changed, but really not so much. Here goes:

------

2011 Honda Odyssey

Kitchenaid Mixer

Ipad

A trip to London (picture me in front of Buckingham Palace)

New Country Kitchen

I don't want to break your pockets too much, but I'm pretty sure I would love the complete 1st Edition set of Harry Potter books, a new desktop computer, and a new house paid for in full with no tax responsibility. I wish BIG!!!

Friday!!!

2010-12-03T10:08:00.007-04:00

Friday's are my very favorite days. I was born on a Friday. I work 10 hour days 4 days a week and Friday is not one of them, (most of the time, and I will elaborate on this issue on a venting day). Friday is the beginning of the weekend, and who hates weekends??? Not me!

Today, I had Panera Bread for breakfast. There's a brand spanking new one in my village. You'd think it was the grand opening of Disney here. It's been a packed house. My village is hungry for all things not here. We'd love a Nordstrom, a P.F. Chang's, ahhh, let's face it, we'd love to have a super shopping mall with all the major stores and restaurants. What we have is a regular mall that hosts a variety of stores, and our biggest department stores are J.C. Penney, and Macy's.

Today, I'm going to a town smaller than my village to have lunch with old friends and co-workers. I really, really dislike this small town so much. I was a trapped being there for 9 years slaving away at one of their plantations, (I worked in mental health). So, happy to be free at last, but today, I'm going to return for a visit, carrying my freedom papers with me, and a big smile upon my face, because I do miss my comrades. We were tortured together and for that we shall always have a bond.

Peace

Prunes, Revisited

2010-11-29T10:11:00.004-04:00

I liked this article on prunes better than the other one in my previous post.

Side Bar: So, I took a gander at my own blog in search of a link,and noticed I had another post this month on prunes. Don't think I'm weird about prunes, they just seemed to be darned important to me right now, so I'm blogging on 'em.

Mid life and Prunes

2010-11-29T09:52:00.004-04:00

Today I'm home, just mentally exhausted, and could not face another day of another day. Do you get what I'm saying? Everyday is almost as if I've relived the same day over. Maybe it's midlife delayed crisis. I need time for me!!! So, today, I'm showered but in jammies. I had 2 cups of coffee this a.m. which is very not me. I'm thinking of cyber shopping because it's cyber shopping day but I'm in the red, so I'll probably just cyber read and comment.

I'm also pondering the benefits of prunes. I ate 4 this morning. I don't like them, but I'm trying to grow accustomed to eating them as its a natural way to feel better, if you know what I mean. I'm also thinking about being more active in my community, but what does that mean? I'm not interested in local politics and with my seedy past, forget about it! Most towns and villages of which I'm a member have great holiday activities, but hey, we're on the crest of December, most community holiday planning took place in September. I don't know. I'll figure some sort of mid life crisis activity to get involved in.

Peace

Happy (burp) Thanksgiving!!!

2010-11-28T22:06:00.003-04:00

I'm not commenting on how I did not follow anybody's diet this WHOLE weekend other than to try to eat some fruit, some veggies, and drink some water. It was a bust! But tomorrow is another day, PRAISE THE LORD!!!

*Hope you had a blessed Thanksgiving.

Peace

Tonight, Harry Potter

2010-11-19T09:01:00.001-04:00

Harry Potter is coming my way this evening. I can't wait. I know some have seen it, and I pray I don't run into them because I am interested in finding out on my own how much it lives up to the book. Of course, I may supply my own spoiler later.

Peace

Confession

2010-11-19T08:51:00.003-04:00

Confessions are sometimes not an easy thing to do. One such as this one is not so hard. I gave up on the 4:00 a.m. venture. Day 2 found me tired, but wanting to stay up to see my usual evening programs. Joking with co-workers, (blame it on peer pressure), found me cracking jokes about being on a self imposed curfew. Apparently, I had a moment of teen aged rebellion still within my veins because I took a stance. I reset my clock for 5:00 a.m., and I told myself if i got up earlier, I'd get up, but if not, so what...! So, 5:00 a.m. it was and 5:00 a.m. it is. I liked 4:00 a.m., but my usual grown up schedule did not. Oh well...confession is all done.

Peace

Pooped

2010-11-18T21:22:00.005-04:00

Today was an excruciatingly long, exhausting day at the old factory, also known as my job, and no, I don't work in a factory, although today I felt as if I were on the line. Pun intended, of course. I wanted to check in to prove I really am back, and I'm blogging.

Plus, I wanted to share Kendi Everyday: The Remix. I'm no clothes horse, but I am loving this event. You choose a total of 30 pieces of clothing and shoes, (don't count coats, but do count jackets/sweaters, and don't count accessories). You have 30 days to mix and match these clothes and shoes, and you can't buy/wear anything outside of these items during the challenge. I shared with a few co-workers and we are talking about doing our own in January 2011, after Santa gives us a bunch of new clothes, (trust me, I'm telling an untruth here). We also talked about how poor we are, and one of my co-workers even said she didn't want to participate because she only has 8 pieces of clothing, (smile).

Anyway, take a peek at Kendi Everyday: The Remix.

Peace

P.S. I weighed in today, and I've lost from what I was, but gained from what I last was on here. A work in progress. I can live with a loss.

4:00 a.m.

2010-11-15T22:16:00.003-04:00

I did it. I'm sleepy. I had an okay day, but I talked a lot about getting up at 4:00 a.m. because I think I was amazed that I really did it and plan on doing it again. I did a bit of Leslie Sansone. Prepared a healthy breakfast. T.V.'d and computer'd for a few minutes, and then started my usual daily routine at 5:00 a.m. Tomorrow is another day. Have a blessed one, I'm off to bed.

Peace.

Dried Prunes, Anyone?

2010-11-14T12:14:00.002-04:00

I purchased dried prunes this morning. I do not like them, but they have a good amount of potassium, and I need the other thing that they do for you, so I'm trying not to complain. It's a natural way to kill 5 birds with 1 stone, ha!

Prunes do have tons of healthful benefits, I can't deny it. Potassium, Fiber, cardiovascular help, naturally sweet, helps with weight loss, lowers cholesterol, etc., so what the heck, I'll give it a try, but I'm gagging on the inside.

Peace

Thinking of Changing

2010-11-13T23:50:00.003-04:00

Just sitting here on my couch, watching The Russell Simmons Show on demand, (don't ask), and thinking about my daily schedule. Just suppose I start getting out of bed at 4:00 a.m. every morning, (my regular time is 5:00 a.m.). Just suppose this would give me enough time to exercise, (stretches), and eat a nice breakfast, and then shower, etc. Just suppose. If I got up at 4:00 a.m. 4 days per week, (I work 4 10 hour days), could I do it? Would I be a cranky fool? And what would this do to my bedtime? Right now, I go when I feel like it. Usually somewhere around 11:00 p.m., then I am in bed with the IPOD surfing around and strangling myself with the cord until at least 12 a.m.

I figure I need at least 6 to 7 hours of sleep per night. Bedtime would then be 9:00 p.m., 10:00 at the latest. Doable, yes. Okay, I'm praying on this, and then I also have to think about what kind of exercise I should do at 4:00 a.m. in the morning, in my living room, not disturbing the 2 year old and the 6 year old little people I'm responsible for, (I'm mother to a 16 year old son, and acting mother to 2 little cousins, and we all live with my retired mother). Okay, let me see if I can work this out.

Peace.

The Quest

2010-11-13T20:15:00.005-04:00

I have returned to Sparkpeople. It's the cheapest way for me to track my weight and meals, because it's free. It's pretty easy to use when tracking your nutrition. You key in every thing you've put in your mouth, usually right after you've swallowed it so that you don't forget it. I get alzheimer's sometimes, especially with regards to what I eat, so it's better for me to key it in right after I've eaten. Anywho...it will tell you all of your daily nutrients based on what you've eaten, and will also let you know what your daily intake should be.

Potassium is the bane of my existence right now. In case you were not aware there's a daily requirement of 2000 mg. to 6000 mg. Sparkpeople says I need 4000 mg. to 6000 mg. I'm having trouble. How many bananas will that take? I mean, that's a huge amount, right? I know, I know, bananas are not the only thing, but when you mention potassium to folks the first thing they say is, "eat a banana." As if 1 banana packs a whopping 6000mg. of potassium. I should be so lucky.

Oats, It's Now or Never!!!

2010-11-12T14:05:00.005-04:00

You ever wonder what the differences are in oats? Why one would be better than another? Well, the link above explains it all, (hit the Oats, It's Now or Never script and go there).

(Excerpt)

Health Benefits of Oatmeal and Oats

Oats, oat bran and oatmeal provide a wide-range of potential health benefits, many of them supported by clinical research. We’ll go into some of them in more detail, but at a high-level the benefits of consuming oat products include:

* Reduced risk of cardiovascular disease
* Improved cardiovascular health in post-menopausal women
* Reductions in serum cholesterol
* Reductions in blood pressure
* Helps control non-insulin-dependent (Type 2) diabetes
* Enhanced immune response to infection
* Stabilization of blood sugar levels
* May lessen the risk of certain cancers via reductions in obesity, as well as antioxidant activity
* Reduced risk of breast cancer
* Decreased symptoms of childhood asthma associated with eating more whole grains and vegetables

I'm BACCCCKKKK!!!!

2010-11-12T13:40:00.002-04:00

Hey-

Wow. I know, I'm sorry, but I'm back!!! I've gained about 7 lbs. I've changed my weigh in day, and I'm walking again. The leg took a toll on me, but I've survived, (I think). I still have a few problems with it, but nothing, in my opinion, major. I notice that I don't walk as fast, and my energy seems to lag, but I'm walking. I've been gathering knowledge from other bloggers, and will definitely post a few of them here. I've missed you, so much, my dear blog. XXXOOO :)

Not Forgotten, Just been healing

2010-08-02T21:19:00.001-03:00

I've had awful luck with my after surgery recuperation. 2 infections later, I'm hoping to get back into the swing of losing very soon. I'm trying to figure out how to wrap my knee, and beat the heat while walking again. I've also been choosing some not too healthy snacks, but have not given up on fruit, veggies, and water, (although I noticed my tea intake has increased, and sweet not unsweetened). I still have not had a soda since the end of November 2009. YAY, Me!!!

Peace

Found This (Click Here for IHerb site)

2010-06-26T16:43:00.005-03:00

I was cruising around the web and ran across this site. I like it, and thought I'd share. They sell lots of herbal products, including vitamins, help for those with acne, dietary needs, etc.

Where'd I Go This Time?

2010-06-26T16:27:00.002-03:00

Hi there! I've been recuperating from surgery. I've not been able to walk like I love to do, which sucks! So, of course, the weights at a stand still. Which is not bad, really. I did panic a bit as my weight went up, but then I realized that I was swollen, (never a good thing, but surgery related).

So, I've avoided the blog, and I've not plotted out my weight loss. Although I did weigh myself weekly and on time. The exception to weighing weekly was this past Tuesday, (my usual weigh in day), I forgot. It was too easy to forget, so here I am. I need to blog and I need to plot. I want to do more than maintain. I want to lose!

So Close

2010-05-25T07:44:00.004-03:00

You ever wonder why you weigh one thing at home, in the privacy of your bathroom butt naked, and another when you're in the doctor's office, usually more than what you weighed at home? I did, and I worried, but I no longer do now. My clothes weigh a ton, because they're fat lady clothes. There's lots of material there. I can live with that now.

Yesterday I went to a specialist regarding a medical issue I'm having. I got on the scale and it showed 4 lbs. more than what I had weighed just that morning in the privacy of my bathroom, butt naked. I didn't blink an eye. The nurse tried to make small talk about weight, and weight gain. She was clueless. She did not know she was dealing with "Beyonce" (me). She had no idea I was FINE!!! (And really, no joke, I am.) I knew where I had come from, and I knew that my clothes weight a ton. I knew what she did not know. And what she did not know is that I'm happy with me right now.

Of course, I want to weigh less. I mean, what would be the purpose of this blog, and the dietary changes I've made if that was not the goal. I'm happy with my awareness of my size, and I'm actively doing something about it. Right now, my little goal is to hit the 280's. I'm sitting right at 290. I'm so close, and I'm so happy.

Peace

And it's a LOSS!!!

2010-05-18T07:04:00.003-03:00

Have you noticed how happy I am when I lose, and how upbeat I try to stay when I gain? I've noticed and I'm glad I am continuing the good behavior. Weight loss really is such an emotional journey. I ate blindly, without a thought of it because I was avoiding myself and what I had allowed myself to become. I was comfortable. I'm still a big lady, but I'm so happy to be shedding the weight.

Yesterday I was in a class for supervisors discussing equal employment laws. We had to discuss a case where a lady was called fat names by her supervisor, and one who could not keep her job because her doctor thought she "waddled" and was not fit enough to drive a city bus. I think last year I would have cracked a few jokes or simply sat quietly if this topic was discussed, or represented/defended the fat lady, (not that there's anything wrong with that). Yesterday, I did not even include myself as a fat lady representative. I sat and noticed how others responded to the question. I may discuss what I noticed in greater detail later. I'm trying to make sure that I present a true picture of what I thought I saw. Oh yeah, a cliff hanger!!! Don't you just love it? lol

Peace

It sucks when you have no one to blame. :(

2010-05-11T21:32:00.003-03:00

I gained 4 pounds. I'm not beating myself up because I had a good weekend with my family, and I enjoyed myself. I do realize now that I am choosing to change my lifestyle and what I could do before and not care, I cannot do any longer because I do care. Sad and sobering moment. Good to know that I don't want to return to the 3's. No way, no how.

Peace

Mother's Day 2010

2010-05-10T10:12:00.004-03:00

Hope you all had a fantabulous day in celebration of Mother's everywhere. We spent a great weekend at Myrtle Beach. I probably made a few poor choices during our Broadway at the Beach appetizer sampling, but dinner was crab legs with no butter.

One great thing diet wise did happen. In all of my years living in the south and growing up here, this was the first time ever I beached it and a soda did not accompany me! I'm proud of that feat. I don't know if there are other recovering sodaholics out here, but soda was a constant appendage to my hand. I've now been soda free since November 29, 2009.

So, the pics are of my son and mother on the beach, and a few snapshots of Ripley's Aquarium. God is so great. He makes the best artistry. The aquarium was beautiful.

Peace

2010-05-07T21:53:00.003-03:00

I discovered this yogurt while visiting someone's blog, (my apologies, I cannot remember whose). I tried it about a week ago, and I LOVED it!

Although I really like yogurt, lactose is not my good friend anymore, so I really limit my dairy and drink mostly lactose free milk. Yogurt does not seem to be a problem for many people who can't indulge in lactose laced foods, but for me it was. Now, with Chobani, I'm happy!!!

Peace

One Last Thing For The Night

2010-05-06T23:39:00.002-03:00

Why can't I be the size I want to be right now? Why is weight loss so slow? Putting it on was not slow, well, maybe it was, but lets focus on my first question. Why can't I be the size I want to be right now?

Peace

PastaQueen | You'll laugh your ass off. (I did.)

2010-05-06T23:34:00.001-03:00

I'm reading Jennette Fulda's book on my new Sony Reader. I'm enjoying it. She's very real and down to earth, plus she can't believe anyone would want to read about her. ARE YOU KIDDING ME, JENNETTE???!!! Our kind is everywhere, and we really are interested in how one of us can do it!!!

2010-05-06T22:56:00.003-03:00

Really. Are we not sick of looking at that salad I ate on last week? Ha! Okay, so this week's weight loss was pretty good. I'm getting closer to a personal goal. I'll yell about it when I get there, or at least so close I can touch it. Walking has not been going too well, this past week or so. I hope to get back at it EVERY DAY!!! Work has stopped me from doing it every day the way I prefer, but I plan on making a few changes in my evening schedule to allow for time to go to the gym and/or the park to get it in, especially when I miss my walks during my work day. Well, it's late here, and I'm facebooking, and googling, too. Check ya later!

Peace.

Lack of Planning, and Hunger. Tomorrow is Another Day. Moving On From Here

2010-04-27T21:55:00.003-03:00

The above salad was a poor choice of a lunch. Poor planning, not paying attention, and fact gathering after the purchase. Zaxby's Zensation Zalad.

I ate it because I was in a work related training, and I was hungry.

The sodium content alone was horrendous. Tomorrow is another day, and another training day to boot. Plan, plan, plan.

NUTRITIONAL INFORMATION

840 Calories
2508 Sodium mg. (Fainted when I saw this, and just recovering)

I can't even comment anymore. Go to Zaxby's Nutritional Menu and take the smelling salts with you. I can't believe I did this, but I've got to move on.

The swollen ankle from last months PMS. Why must I be a sweller? Before you respond, this was last month, and not reflective of today's big BIG DUMB MISTAKE!!!

Gain

2010-04-27T09:20:00.002-03:00

Today, I gained .6, but I'm cool with it. I'm PMSing. It's the never ending cycle. It's just me PMSing with a diuretic prescription in action. I showed my doctor a picture of my swollen ankles from last month, (I'll post it later), and she told me to continue to take the pills. Duh!!! Maybe I need a new doctor.

Peace.

Keeping It Real

2010-04-25T22:01:00.007-03:00

BMI (Body Mass Index)

Underweight Below 18.5
Normal 18.5 - 24.9
Overweight 25.0 - 29.9
Obesity 30.0 - 39.9
Over 40 MORBIDLY OBESE

When you are morbidly obese, BMI is the last thing on your mind. I used to see BMI and think, BLT. Get my point?

Posting The Weight

2010-04-25T19:33:00.002-03:00

I decided to let you know. A very big step, because my weight is private and has been private for years. I don't tell. Plain and simple. It's been my secret. Although I'm letting you in on it, I'm not ready to let my family in on it, nor my friends. The time will come, but now is not the time. I'm not totally comfortable. You, blogging world, are one of the lucky few. Whoever happens to happen upon this blog, I'm assuming I don't know you, (although if you have a blog, I just may be one of your readers). So, when I unveil my weight to those who know me in person, I'll share their reactions here, for sure. Whew...I feel better already.

Just Some Thoughts

2010-04-24T14:07:00.004-03:00

I was in the park this past Monday evening walking with my son. We passed 2 ladies, one of which looked as if she was not used to walking. Of course, she was overweight. Her friend was talking a mile a minute and not noticing. Maybe no one but the very overweight would have noticed. I noticed. And, I knew.

When you are an overweight person who wants to do something about your weight, like maybe go to the park and walk, you want to look as normal as everyone else. So, you concentrate. Am I breathing hard? Can I not fall? How much further is it? Oh no, I'm sweating! Is anyone noticing? My shoes feel funny. Is my outfit okay for this? I feel light headed. Can I make it? I just want her to stop talking so I can get this over with.

You see, it's a make or break deal. Either you'll come back, hopefully alone, or at least you will have hinted to you friend that you want her to go on ahead, and walk, and you'll be along. Or you won't come back. Now remember, I am generalizing. All people are different, I know. But the uncomfortably overweight, in my opinion, likes the solitude of exercising in as much privacy as possible, or teaming up with people of like minds. People who understand.

It is hard to push your body out of the house to specifically exercise when you have led a sedentary lifestyle. It's real hard to keep coming back for more. I hope she comes back for more, because good health and living is worth it.

OH YEAH!!!

2010-04-13T23:55:00.002-03:00

I LOST!!! I had a good 2 plus weight loss this week, so I'm all psyched up!!! I also went for a 2 mile walk this evening in the park with my son, the teen. I needed it, even though I prefer walking in the mornings. It wasn't too bad. Well, it's late now, and I'm off to bed. Later!!!

Weight Loss

2010-04-11T10:30:00.002-03:00

So, my last weigh in I lost. I'm happy about the loss. Really happy. I had gained about 6.5 lbs. fluid. I was puffy, but after taking my prescribed pills, and after the dreaded PMS turned into the dreaded monthly adventure, the fluid was released, and for that I am grateful. I'm scheduled for a physical on next Friday,and my plan is to show my doctor pictures I took of my ankles during this last bout of fluid, and to discuss why this happens, more specifically, why does this happen to me.

Today, I'm thinking about going to Sam's Club to pick up a few things. I have a few things to read, (Fast Food Nation and Half Assed), plus, I have a new Ipod Touch with a docking station for my office, and a new Sony Reader. So, lots of gadgeting planned.

Happy Resurrection Day

2010-04-04T19:44:00.003-03:00

Having a wonderful day lazing around. I churched, I ate, and I napped. Wishing you and your family a very blessed day!!!

Why Does PMS Cause Swollen Ankles? - Associated Content - associatedcontent.com

2010-03-30T21:22:00.000-03:00

Why Does PMS Cause Swollen Ankles? - Associated Content - associatedcontent.com

The swelling is awful now. I looked down at my feet and ankles, and I was in shock. My fingers are swollen, too. Fluid retention is no joke. Yes, I did call in my prescription today and will pick it up on tomorrow. I weighed today and I had a weight gain, and I was not surprised.

The Weigh Everyday Plan

2010-03-29T23:22:00.003-03:00

I have decided, beginning today, I will be weighing myself everyday. Only for one week. If you knew me, you'd know this move is so anti-me. I weigh every week. Once per week, that's it. I have decided to make this daring move to see how my weight fluctuates, or if it fluctuates. I'm hoping it will make me more conscious of the little slip ups I make during the day. You know the slip ups? Like having a sweet iced tea instead of unsweeetened, (I'm a southern lady, we drink iced tea and we love it). Like eating too much white rice, especially of the Jasmine variety, which is my absolute favorite, but it really packs on the calories for a serving. I also love country ham, (another southern thing).

I would also like to have a reasonable cut off time for eating. I won't say 7 p.m., but I may try 8 p.m. The reason I won't say 7 p.m. is because I usually don't get in until 6 p.m. or so. 7 p.m. would not work for me. Anyway, I'm rambling here. I'll keep you posted on the outcome. Tuesday is my regular weigh day, but I weighed today, (Monday) and I weighed the exact same thing I weighed last Tuesday. I'm not looking forward to tomorrow. Reason(s): I have awful PMS and bloating is included and it's not just a few days of bloating, and aches and pains. It's usually a week or more. Last weeks weigh in was reflective of this problem, and this week will more than likely be the same because in addition to PMS, I let myself run out of blood pressure/diuretic pills. I know, I know..., I'm calling in tomorrow for my refill.

3 Miles

2010-03-28T14:28:00.004-03:00

Today was the THE day! Today was the DAY! TODAY was the day! TODAY WAS THE DAY THAT I WALKED 3 MILES!!! Oh yeah, I'm dancing, I'm dancing, I'm dancing!!! Today I hit a goal and it feels great!!! I don't know what tomorrow may bring, but today, I walked 3 miles non stop!!! I feel real good!!!

More on Premenstrual Weight Gain and Bloating

2010-03-27T13:50:00.002-03:00

How to Avoid PMS Weight Gain Starting This Month | eHow.com

This article tells you how to avoid the weight gain. I'm 48. I'm not convinced that I can avoid it. So far I haven't, but okay, next month I'll try to keep this article in my memory bank and follow through.

Water retention: Relieve this premenstrual symptom - MayoClinic.com

The Mayo Clinic keeps it pretty real for the unhealthy and healthy folks. So, I do buy into this article of ways to reduce symptoms, including following up with your physician if it's a continuous problem.

Healthy Organic Eating

2010-03-23T23:17:00.001-03:00

Healthy Organic Eating: "For other organics, the local Grocery Outlet (discount groceries) has started carrying them, and they’re always great buys (no meat yet though). Farmer’s markets and, during summer, local U-pick farms, are always on my “hit” list. There are also sites online (www.horizonorganics.com, http://www.kashi.com, http://www.stonyfieldfarm.com, http://www.scojuice.com, http://www.mambosprouts.com, http://www.edenfoods.com,www.amyskitchen.com, http://www.organicvalleycoop ) where you can print up coupons. You can find a list of links for organic coupons here: http://deals.families.com/link.....ons,t19985"

I happened upon this information tonight. It's a keeper!

This Sucks!!!

2010-03-23T22:26:00.002-03:00

I gained. I'm premenstrual. I'll try again. Sometimes being a woman hurts. Men don't have this problem of weight gain due to hormonal changes. PEOPLE!!! THIS SUCKS!!!

The Weekend

2010-03-21T22:41:00.002-03:00

This weekend started with a bang and ended with a fizzle. I had to let a person know exactly how I feel about a situation that I am not pleased with at this time. I let myself get real worked up about it, but afterwards I decided that God's will, will be done. I'm sticking with His will.

I cooked a West African dish that I love. It's a spinach stew. I used stew beef as the meat. I could have cooked it with chicken, but I wanted beef. The bad things in the stew is palm oil, and putting it over rice. Now rice can go either way, but I used jasmine and I ate more than one cup full. Today, no less, was a flush it out day. Weigh in for me is Tuesday's, so I have really got to be careful. I don't want to gain. I want to lose.

Have a great work week for those of you who work, and for those who don't, just have a great week!

Peace.

The Weight.

2010-03-15T19:54:00.003-03:00

So, in thinking about what I wrote on yesterday about the things that I fear being a morbidly obese lady, my thoughts are, there are many fears. I’ve always been able to carry my weight proportionately. I’m tall. I’m big boned. Even when I was not considered “obese” I was bigger than the average person. And yes, I was a big baby, child, teen, young adult. I feel the need to explain this because by chance an average person will read this and I want to make sure that they understand the maneuvers heavier people make to fit in and get around in our society.

When I go to the movies I’m thinking about the movie, yes, but I’m also thinking about how comfortable is the chair? Will I be able to get out of it easily because weight has made my knees not so good anymore. Our State Fair is another one. I love planning to go, and really, I do love going. Will I get on a ride? Oh yes…, I remember loving rides, but getting on, uh..., no. How embarrassed do I feel that my Mother will ride park rides with my son, (who is a teen now)? I’m way embarrassed. I don’t know if they have figured out why I don’t ride. Do they believe my meek excuses of “I came to eat the grilled corn and play games!” I want to ride. I am looking forward to riding again.

I had never been to a college basketball game before. I’m talking a major state college game where I could catch a glimpse of Michael Jordan in the bleachers. I got the tickets, one for me and one for my teenager. I planned the trip. I was excited!!! Until I saw the stadium seats, and I knew it would be awful. I stuffed myself in, and endured pinched thighs, leg numbness, knee pain, and embarrassment as I saw a gentleman whisper to his teen daughter, “will you be okay sitting next to her?” She said, “Yes,” and I was thankful for her kindness. I felt awful. The walk back to the car was a nightmare. A large crowd, a major university campus full of hills, and this night it was all uphill, and me, huffing and puffing, and trying to look normal. Just how fat was I?

I purposely stayed away from doctors as much as I could because the nurse is the weigher, and I, the weighee, did not want the nurse to know how much I really weighed. I loved one nurse greatly at my primary physician’s office because she told me I could refuse to be weighed. I exercised then…, yes, my right to refuse to be weighed. My gynecologist visit this past year changed all of this for me. After avoiding having a mammogram and the dreaded smear for almost 5 years, I decided I better go. By now I was being prescribed a high blood pressure, diuretic pill combination of which I rarely took as I had reasoned with myself that I only needed it when my ankles were swollen a lot, not just puffy, which was now my regular look.

The nurse was very nice, and when asking about prescribed medications I had to divulge that yes, I was prescribed a blood pressure pill, and no, I was not taking it regularly, because it made me pee too much. I had no time for peeing. She looked at me and did not blink an eye as she proceeded to tell me that she, too, was prescribed that same medication, and at our age, (47), and with my race, (African American), and at my size, (very large), I needed to start taking that pill regularly. She even told me that everyone in her office knows that between 7:30 a.m. and 11:00 a.m. she is in the bathroom peeing. She must have sold me out to the doctor because he told me upon examination that I needed to take that pill, “it’s the best on the market.” Well, what could I say but, “Okay, I will.” Before I escaped, plump ankles, and knee slightly stiff, the doctor called me into his office to review my examination with me. He was very kind, and to the point. “Lose the weight.” “Okay,” said I, and hobbled out.

So, I guess I feared confrontation when addressing my own weight. How can eating things so good, with no thought or plan, turn out to be so bad? I recognize now that it’s when I ate without thinking, and sometimes not tasting. It’s when I did not move enough, meaning exercise at all to keep my organs doing their job. It’s when I let me go and gave no thought to my life, and how long I wanted to live, and be vibrant and happy, and yes, healthy. I had given up on me.

Blogging Explanation

2010-03-14T18:18:00.002-03:00

This blog has been my blog for a number of years. I decided to delete everything I ever wrote on it and to start this new blog. I love using the moniker, "Peace Daily," so there was no reason for me to delete the blog and start a brand new one.

Dieting

2010-03-14T15:56:00.007-03:00

What an ugly word, huh? DIEt, (and yes, I spelled it with emphasis on DIE)). That's how I felt when I made this nearly new decision to lose weight. If I don't diet I will die. I can say that because I was and I am morbidly obese. I don't need to sweeten the deal by calling this a "healthy lifestyle choice." If I don't lose weight, weight will win, and I will DIE from obesity or health related issues that can come from being obese. Yes, you've heard them all before, diabetes, heart disease, strokes, kidney failure, fat livers, etc.

I don't remember the day when I didn't know me. Who was this fat unhealthy woman who detested exercising, would not take vitamins no day, (forget about one a day), who as her gynecologist noted was prescribed the best hypertension medicine on the market and who was not taking them unless she looked down and saw her ankles were swollen. Then she took that blame pill for the diuretic that was in it. I loved salty foods and snacks, just as equally as I loved sweets. In fact, I loved them together.

I was unhealthy, and I didn't know how to address it or even if I had the energy to address it. That was then and this is now. What clicked in my 47 year old head, (I'm 48 now)? There was nothing different about the decision or was there? Anyone who has dieted or tried to live a healthy lifestyle knows the routine. You plan when you will be starting to live healthy. You go to the store and purchase what will provide you with healthy nutrition, won't make you feel hungry before noon, and depressed by 8:00 p.m. You think about exercising and even go to the trouble of maybe joining a gym, or buying a new "work out" outfit with the "right" shoes. You may be like me, join Weight Watchers for the umpteenth time. I would join for the meetings or get tired of the meetings and join online. I can count points in my sleep. I know what Core is and how to work it. I know.

What I didn't digest was as you age, if you have been so blessed to have not keeled over from being morbidly obese, then God is giving you a chance to change your life for the better. To be around for your children if you have them, to one day see your grandkids, and to feel good about yourself. Not just for appearance sake, but to know you can climb stairs and not struggle for breath. You can walk a college campus with your child and not be embarrassed because you're too fat and you need to sit down, or lean on something, anything to help you balance the poundage.

I discovered I wanted a normal life where I did not have to compensate for being overweight. And those of you who are right now or have ever been, you know exactly what I mean. The compensations you make for yourself that those who are really not paying attention, never even notice. See that chair up there? I am afraid of it. Where do you sit in that type of chair? Oh yes, outdoor activities with huge crowds. That chair has a certain amount of weight that it will or is supposed to hold comfortably. I weighed more. And I have enough sense to not even try it in public. I have no desire to have folks laugh at the overweight lady who broke her chair at the game. I have pride!

So, I'm spilling my guts here. Since 11/29/2009 I no longer drink sodas. No soda of any kind. Not diet, and certainly not regular. I gave it up. I walk. I walk just about everyday. I think about what I put in my mouth. I use SparkPeople.com faithfully. I keep track of calories. I'm trying my best to be aware of my sodium intake. I drink water. I eat 5 times a day for the most part. Breakfast is around 8:00 a.m. A snack around 10:00 a.m. or so. Lunch is around 12:00 p.m., and another snack around 2:30 or so. Dinner and a dessert. I'm eating all day and I'm loving it. I'm not feeling deprived. I feel good about myself. I can't believe it. And guess what? It has worked. Since 11/29/2009 I've lost 25.4 lbs.

I'm dieting, and this is my diet blog. Welcome!